Today I would like to give a warm welcome to Abby Niles, who is joining us with her recent release of EXTREME LOVE!
Flirting Checklist.
When I saw this on my list of blogs to write for Extreme Love’s blog tour, my first reaction was to panic. My gaze snapped up to my roommate and BFF, eyes round in horror and said, “You won’t believe what I need to write about.”
“What?” she asked.
“They want me to give a flirting checklist.”
Her face screwed up in an oh-hell-girl expression. “You’re going to have to do some research.”
In which I burst into a fit of laughter. She knows me well. But it calmed me and I saw how I needed to approach this blog…with honesty. You see, I can’t flirt. It’s a running joke with anyone who knows me. Flirting and my personality just don’t mix. I have more of a chance of grabbing a guy’s attention with one of my off-colored remarks than trying to be flirtatious. I just expressed this to my friend, and she started nodding and laughing. I accepted my flirting skills were nil a long time ago. I can’t be seductive either.
Let me give you an example. A couple of years ago, on my birthday, me and a few girlfriends had a few too many to drinks and the camera came out. We were posing “seductively” for the camera. At least, they were. Me? Yeah, the next morning when we came across my picture the house erupted into hilarity. It was that BAD. I swear, if I could find it, I would share it. So I don’t “flirt” in the traditional sense. So I’m going to share Abby Niles’ flirting checklist.
Smartass banter. I seem to have a quip for everything. It something I really can’t help, the smartass just comes out of me. There are two different reactions I get from men with my free mouth. I get a scowl or a half-smile. The half-smile is usually followed with a witty comeback. I appreciate a good smartass. Being able to toss words back and forth with a man is extremely sexy to me and I’m much more liable to give a great wise-crack more attention than I am a cheesy come-on.
Laughter. No, I’m not talking the breathy chuckle thing. I couldn’t do a breathy chuckle to save my life. I mean real laughter, from the gut. When something really amuses me, I have this laugh. It’s loud and full of mirth. I can turn heads with it. But here’s the thing…when a man gets this laugh out of me because of something he said, his reaction is instant. For a split second, he looks stunned but then he grins, a FULL grin, and his shoulders go a little further back as he stands straighter. That’s right, I just let him know I found him hilarious and most men really dig that.
Be yourself. This is really the most important requirement on my checklist. I have a friend who is a pro at flirting, it comes naturally to her. Sensuous comments come out of her mouth as easily as quips come out of mine. If traditional flirting is your thing, then by all means, go with it! It’s who you are. But if you’re like me and flirting just feels forced, don’t feel like it’s something you have to do. It comes across as strained and, as far as I am concerned, that’s not showing the real you. Flirt in the way you are comfortable with. If the guy doesn’t respond, then most likely he’s not the guy for you anyway.
And there you have it. My checklist. There’s not much to it, but it still brings amused half-smile to a man’s lips and an interested gleam to his eyes. Everyone has their way of flirting. I’d like to hear yours.
Crystal, thank you so much for having me today! Been fun!
Abby
Dante “Inferno” Jones is used to winning in the ring. But when the MMA fighter meets pretty Caitlyn Moore, he seems to be striking out left and right. The more Cait denies his advances, the more intrigued he becomes by the sharp-tongued beauty. She’s a challenge he can’t resist.Comfortable with the average Joe, Cait doesn’t get it when the ultra-masculine Dante walks into her life and expresses an interest in her. Sure, she’s shed eighty pounds and her confidence is building, but there’s nothing spectacular about her. Certainly not enough to hang onto a ripped babe-magnet like Dante, whose violent profession, catty groupies, and cruel competitors are already making her life a living hell.Dante’s light-hearted pursuit quickly becomes a battle to win her heart as they find themselves thrown together again and again—and it’s affecting his training. Cait won’t let him lose the biggest fight of his career because of her, but when her plan to keep him focused lands her in the dangerous clutches of Dante’s vicious opponent, there is more at stake than just the championship belt.Barnes & Noble - Amazon
About the author:
Ever since Abby Niles picked up her first Sweet Valley High book in sixth grade and fell in love with Elizabeth and Todd, she's been hooked on romance. By the time she reached high school, she was devouring meatier romances with pirates, cowboys and knights. She never imagined that those years of reading would one day lead to her becoming a published author.
In her late twenties, after having twins and becoming a stay-at-home mom, she started doodling stories to keep her sanity. Next thing she knew, she was actually submitting to publishing houses. And was immediately rejected. That didn't stop her though. She found herself some kickass critique partners, honed her craft, and continued submitting.
And eventually sold a short story, then a novella, then a novel, and now a series.
Today, she juggles work, home life, and writing. It's not always easy, but hey, who said life was easy?
In her downtime, which isn't often, you can find her playing 'Just Dance' with her kids or trying to catch up on her never-ending to-be-read list. She also loves Zumba, and refuses to admit she looks more like Animal doing his Muppet flail than a sensual Latin dancer.
http://www.abbynilesauthor.com/
~*GIVEAWAY*~
Abby is giving away one digital copy of EXTREME LOVE to one reader today. To enter, just leave a comment on this post telling us what might be on your own flirting checklist, or your tips to flirting maybe! Then fill out the Rafflecopter below. Good luck!
flirting is all about the eye contact!
ReplyDeleteI suck at flirting unfortunately. But I have been told that you should smile a lot!
ReplyDeleteI start showing my interest by a slow, very thorough look up and down. Then I give a slow closed mouth smile and lick my lips. I generally don't have to do too much after that little ploy.
ReplyDeleteI think this book sounds so great and intriguing!! You cannot go wrong with a MMA fighter and girls knowing he's not right for her! The chase is great!
ReplyDeleteOmg flirting and me do not mix either! I'm just like you crystal. I'm better off catching attention with my mouth and like you some ppl like it and one get offended! My husband when were were talking and listing before we were n item he was like me had a comeback or everything and we kept each other laughing. That's how we still re! If I tried to be seductived I would definitely be an awkward mess!
ReplyDeleteMmm I don't really know, but I guess the best tip would be to just be yourself, no pint in faking it.
ReplyDeleteGlad I'm not alone on the flirting challenged front!! :):) Eye contact was a really good one!
ReplyDeleteSebella--I bet the men do love that!
Eye contact, small smile, and flick of my hair always works for me.
ReplyDeleteI'm definitely not the worlds best at flirting but I always think good eye contact and a smile are a good start.
ReplyDeleteBesides being myself, I would say eye contact and body language!
ReplyDeleteBarrie
I've been married too long to remember how to flirt! LOL! Plus I was too shy so just being yourself is the best advice I can think of.
ReplyDeleteI totally suck at flirting. Although according to my husband I can be a flirt when I want to be.
ReplyDeletelauratroxelatyahoodotcom
I am not great at flirting. I think listening is one good way though.
ReplyDeletedebby236 at gmail dot com
Um, yeah, I have nonexistent flirting skills. I can, however, banter like a champ, and being European, I can out-double-entendre anyone. I've shocked quite a few blokes in my time :).
ReplyDeleteLOL... I'm also terrible at flirting so I can't add anything. In fact, I'm taking notes :) Thanks for the fun post and giveaway!
ReplyDeleteI'm terrible at flirting so I would just go with be yourself then there's no pretense you have to remember to live up to and why waste time on someone who doesn't like the real you?
ReplyDeleteEye contact and that chemistry that makes your tummy flutter! =D
ReplyDeleteLoved the blurb & excerpt, can´t wait for my chance to read more!
Thanks for the giveaway & Happy Thursday!
//Linda
I don't flirt... I don't think it's in me because I'm to shy... I guess if I had enough alcohol in me I could but sober it is a no go!!!!
ReplyDeleteLove this page!!!
can't wait to read this!!
I love your list and have to agree with clever, funny banter. I don't think I'm seductive either but my husband might disagree. lol He is very funny and we both are a bit sarcastic so that is a big part of my list. Congratulations on your release!
ReplyDeleteIt's such a relief to know I'm not alone in being flirting challenged! LOL. Also some great tips for us non-flirters from the flirters! Thanks so much for stopping by!
ReplyDeleteNot a big flirt-er, but I agree with the eye contact.
ReplyDeleteThis book sounds fab, looking forward to reading it!
Have a great day! (:
I AM NOT ALLOWED TO FLIRT AS MY DH IS STILL JEALOUS AFTER 40 YEARS! LOL
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure about flirting. Haven't really had to use it in a long time. But eye contact & just being myself is what seems to have worked in the past. I enjoyed reading your post. You are right some girls, as well as guys, have that knack of flirting & others haven't been gifted with it. I'm looking forward to reading this book. I enjoyed reading about it.
ReplyDeleteI can't flirt to save my life. Seriously. I end up scaring the men away.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, best advice I've ever gotten: be yourself.
I'm not very good at flirting.
ReplyDeleteI would say just be yourself.
Thanks for the chance to win!
I couldn't flirt to save my life!!
ReplyDeleteFlirting starts with chemistry- once you have that- then you can lure them in with a look. sdylion(at)gmail(dot)com
ReplyDeleteA nice smile and sense of humor!
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Leanne
It's all about the eye contact baby! ;)
ReplyDelete